Dichotomy- A Tale of You and Me
by mimiwritesalot
Summary: A retelling of Cristina and Owen's story. Cristina is hesitant about being involved with Owen so he tries his best to convince her otherwise. Based in Season 5.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note-** This story is set in Season 5 and will definitely be a multi-chapter fic. I am still not sure how soon I will be uploading the next one but I'll try my best to make it as soon as I possibly can. Please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

_Does it really happen? Does someone just come into your life and change you? Change the way you live? Change the way you thought about things? Can someone have such an influence? And is a gaze or kiss enough for them to change you? Can someone change the very core of you?_

Another rainy day dawned in Seattle as Cristina slapped the alarm clock. She always awoke suddenly and swiftly. Her years as an intern and now as a resident had taught her to be up and on her feet within seconds. Her body was adjusted to going without sleep or food for many hours on end. When she slept, she slept deeply. And awoke promptly.

Mornings had always been her least favorite time of the day. They were too quiet and much too cold for her liking. Especially in Seattle, the mornings tended to be damp. But she didn't mind the rain. She quite liked it in fact, even when the rain made her curly hair curlier than ever.

Cristina Yang was a lot of things, but she was not the kind of woman who complained about her hair.

Yes, Cristina Yang was a lot of things.

She was ambitious, talented, intelligent, surprisingly perceptive at times, wild and witty.

If you asked anyone about her, they would tell you that she was always on top of her game. Her professors, friends, peers, supervisors, attendings, hell even her kindergarten teachers could tell you that.

She was extremely proud of the women she had turned out to be. She was even more proud of the surgeon she had turning into. She was better than everyone in her program. That didn't surprise her. She was almost always better than most people in her classes. It only seemed natural she would be better than others at surgery.

The day she had started her internship at Seattle Grace Hospital, she knew she was in the right place. She could remember the day she walked into the hospital and took her surroundings in. It was like arriving.

Arriving home.

Sure, it was a lot of grunt work in the beginning but she was prepared for that. They don't let you cut on your first day out of medical school. She was even making friends. Well, friend. Just Meredith. She only considered Meredith her friend in the beginning.

Then Burke happened. And it was amazing. For a while. The sex was great, the learning was great, the surgeries were even better.

But then it all turned, very suddenly into something else. It was like she was falling down an abyss. And she couldn't do anything. She didn't want to do anything about it. Falling into that abyss, at that moment seemed like something she could not resist.

But its not always fairy tale endings is it? Life is never really how you expect it to be.

She made her peace with it. Peace with the fact that he left her in a poofy wedding dress no less, without a proper real goodbye, sent his mother to get his things, which she had to admit was quite a cowardly move. It still stung when she would catch his name in the middle of a someone's conversation and it would almost always be accompanied by "Harper Avery Award". After the stinging would disappear, she would take a deep breath knowing that she was better for it.

For being left. And she would swallow the lump that almost always accompanied these encounters.

But on this cold rainy morning, Burke was not the man she was thinking of. Her thoughts were occupied with a Major Owen Hunt, or otherwise known as" the guy who pulled out my icicle without permission after I was karmically impaled for telling Meredith what I thought about her and Derek moving in together".

Its not like she didn't think about him. When a man like that just pops out of nowhere and kisses you like that, you think about. You think about it often.

But she had seen him the night before and he mentioned something about work. He looked good in civilian clothing. Maybe he was coming to work in Seattle Grace?

No, Cristina scoffed at her thoughts as she poured coffee into a flask. Definitely not. He had turned down the chief's offer.

And since when do I care whether he is coming to work at Seattle Grace? She thought, as she shrugged on her jacket and opened her front door ready to brace the cold.

By the time she had walked into the hospital she had already forgotten about Major Owen Hunt. Her thoughts were all blood and whether Hahn would let her scrub in on anything. She spotted Meredith and was soon entrapped in the stories of Ellis Grey giving her daughter an Anatomy Jane doll.

Everything seemed like it always was.

Except it wasn't.

Because as she and Meredith turned a corner, he was there. Mid conversation with Sloan, Shepherd and the Chief.

He was wearing dark blue scrubs, _attending_ scrubs, and a lab coat over it. He was going to work here after all.

And before she could register anything else, she grabbed Meredith and ran.

Because now, she was the kind of women who ran.

Owen was certain he had heard a voice exclaim "Run!" and he was even more certain that a curly haired woman was running away, with another blonde haired woman accompanying her.

It couldn't be her. Or could it? And more importantly, was she running away from _him_?

Don't blame her, Owen thought to himself. That was an encounter he was anxious to get over with. He was equally anxious to not see her. But how was that even possible? He knew she would be here when he had called up Dr Webber in hopes that the job offer from several months ago was still open. And he would be lying if he said that she was not partly the reason he wanted to come and work here.

Of course, he had told himself for a while that it was nothing. He had kissed other women before and she obviously must kissed other men before too. A woman with lips like that and a wit like that.. well... anyone would want to kiss her.

But the closer he was to actually starting his first day, she started taking up more space in his mind. He did not take this job for her. He had no intention of wooing her or even kissing her couldn't even if he wanted to. Maybe she has forgotten about me, Owen told himself all day long.

She probably has a boyfriend, Owen thought to himself. He hadn't even bothered to ask her the night he met her. He had known in his heart that she was not involved with anyone. Women who were happily in love or in a relationship did not look at men the way she had that night.

He was happy to be here. Although it might seem monotonous to work in a hospital after serving in Iraq, Owen knew that this is what he needed. Not that he had any other options. He had been discharged.

Those words felt like venom in his mouth every time he thought or spoke about it.

Yes, the hospital was exactly what he needed.

As the rest of the day when on, he got a confirmation that she had definitely run away from him this morning. During the skills labs, she was trying her best to hide behind the pretty, dark haired intern. Grey, was it? Cristina probably thought he hadn't noticed, oh but he had.

He decided to play it cool then, if she didn't want to be fraternizing with him. And then he did the stupidest thing ever. He called her "Cristine." As if, he did not know her name. It felt stupider still after she grabbed his arm and asked him if he really didn't remember his name and he confessed to her that he had remembered her name.

And before he knew it, he was telling her about his unit, the R.P.G. ambush, his discharge, the before and the after. She listened to him without saying a word.

He left as soon as he had said what he had wanted to. He headed back to the ER. He needed to work. To do anything other than think about the way a wispy curl had escaped her braid. And the way her hands had rubbed her forehead and rested at the side of her face.

It was only his first day and he had already spilled his guts to her. Damn,it was just something about her that made him do it. He felt that he needed to give an explanation as to why he didn't supposedly know her name anymore. He needed her to understand so that maybe he might get closer to understanding.

How was he going to get through the rest of the day, week or months if he felt like this on his first day?


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**\- Thank you so much for the lovely reviews, they were very encouraging. I hope you enjoy this chapter as well and again, I would love to hear your thoughts. :)

* * *

Owen took a deep breath, squeezed his eyes shut and tried once again to sleep. Sleep didn't come easy to him these days and he was used to it. Having a drink or two usually helped the unwanted images and sounds from appearing every time he closed his eyes. But he couldn't drink while he was on call. And today, every time he closed his eyes, he was not met by his usual demons. He was met by Cristina's face.

It was, of course, a much welcome distraction. Except he kept remembering their last conversation. He had come down hard on her. And on everyone else, but especially her. When Dr. Webber had asked him to watch the second year residents, he had gone out of his way to make sure that he was not favoring Cristina. He didn't want to tell the Chief that she was excellent and that she should be awarded the solo surgery. He wanted so badly for someone else to be better or just as good as she was. But it was so damn hard to notice anyone else or their skills when she was in the room.

Perhaps its because you are attracted to her, said the annoying voice in his head. And because you kissed her. And because if she hadn't stopped you that night, you would have had her.

Owen rolled over, pushing his face into the pillow and let out a little groan. He was so glad that he hadn't gone further that night because there was no way he would have been able to work with her so closely now and not want to have her. That kiss had made everything hard enough already.

But she was excellent and he had told her so. Her bedside manner needed a lot of work and she really needed to learn how to call people by their names. He remembered she had called her intern "Three". Now Owen knew what it was like to be in command and he liked the heady feeling it had always given him, but he never ever used nicknames as demeaning as a number.

But she had asked for and remembered the patients name which made him think that she most probably knew her interns names as well. So why did she feel the need to call them by numbers? Maybe she just wanted to establish her authority. Perhaps she wanted to distance. He had seen the look on her face when she had talked about her Dad. There was a vulnerability to her when she had finally looked up to meet his eyes as she had said "That's why I do this."

But then the softness was gone and immediately replaced by that very distinct, determined look she always had. She went on to say "And that's also why I win all the contests." and Cristina Yang was back.

It wasn't uncommon to meet surgeons who were more on the unattached side. Most of the times you had to be unattached in a way, just so you could be objective when it came to the saving lives part. But you also needed to care, to remember why you got into this is the first place. The most hard was trying to find a good balance of the two. Most surgeons had to work on one or the other more. Then of course, the arrogance. Surgeons as a bunch tended to have that arrogance. And its hard not to. Having your hands inside a persons' body, fixing them, healing them could easily make you arrogant. It can easily make you feel invincible. Humility would be sure to follow soon enough, after losing that battle between playing God and trying to save a life.

You did not have to be a genius to see that Cristina had a wall, no a _fort_ surrounding her. She picked and chose what and who she cared about. But she did not let on more than she knew, Owen concluded. She was one hell of a woman. And he felt bad. He had hoped to teach her a lesson. He had not expected that he would be hearing story about a dead parent. She did not let people in easily, yet she told him something very close to her heart. Something that drove her to become who she was today.

And Owen felt lucky that he knew something others did not know.

Owen turned around and lay flat on his back, giving up on sleep. He opened his eyes and a plan was forming in his head. He already knew that he was attracted to her but he wanted more. So maybe he could change his mind about getting to know her.

It would be just an attending getting to know his resident. And if she happened to return his feelings, well then... that would be just perfect. At the very least, they could be friends.

Or not.

We'll see, Owen thought as he sat up, smiling to himself.

* * *

Cristina dragged herself into the hospital, covering up a yawn with her hand. She was exhausted and it was an ungodly hour of the morning. She had scrubbed in on a surgery with Bailey late last night and as a result had slept less than usual. She could have just slept in the hospital but she had been dying to sleep in her own bed. And having an apartment across from the hospital made leaving it much more tempting than before.

But her sleeplessness was nothing that couldn't be fixed by coffee. She took a sip from her flask and headed towards the elevator waiting for it to come down. It opened up a couple of seconds later and Cristina was surprised to find it empty. Usually you would end up running into someone you were trying to avoid in the elevators at the hospital.

Not today, Cristina thought to herself as she pressed the button for the floor she wanted, and backed up all the way to the railing.

And as luck would have it, just as the elevator doors were about to close, a hand stopped it and in came Owen.

Spoke to soon, Cristina thought as she made shifted a little making room for him.

"Good Morning" He said, giving her a slight smile.

Cristina picked that very moment to take a sip of coffee just to avoid having to talk to him. She nodded and returned his smile with an equally cautious one. She was hoping she wouldn't have to see him for a little while. She hadn't seen him since she had told him about her Dad. Why had she done that? Why had she needed him to believe that she was not as heartless as she usually seemed? They were silent for about thirty seconds and she was hoping they would stay that way for the rest of the ride, but he broke the silence by saying "I'm sorry."

"Why?" Cristina asked, utterly confused.

"I didn't mean to upset you the other day." He said, looking sideways at her.

"You didn't." She kept looking ahead. She really did _not_ want to talk about this. Once was hard enough.

"Oh. That's good." He continued. "But I know that could not have been an easy thing to talk about and I am sorry that I was harsh and that you had to tell me that in order to.. um.. - "

"Justify my actions?" She finally looked him in the eye and he was met with a cold look.

"No, I was not going to say that." He turned towards her, his eyes pleading. He could tell he was walking on eggshells and he needed to make things right with her.

"Its fine. I know what you were trying to say." She looked back ahead.

He instantly missed her gaze, even though it had been cold and withdrawn.

The elevator opened and Cristina walked out, with Owen following her closely.

"So we're good?" He asked, as he grabbed a chart from the nurse's station and opened it.

She looked up at him as if trying to decide whether he was serious. Good? When had they not been good? Did he really think he had upset her so much? Why did he care? None of the attendings ever cared this much.

"Yes, we're good." She answered.

"Good."

They both looked at each other, feeling the gap in their conversation yet now knowing how to move forward. Something was happening between them as their eyes silently conversed.

Cristina broke the silence first "I have pre-rounds."

"Yeah, I do too." He said, clearing his throat

They both nodded and went their ways.

Owen sighed as he walked down the hallway, his walk commanding and purposeful as always. He must be an idiot to think that this was going to be easy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note:** This one is definitely longer than the previous chapters. The part in italics is from Chapter 2 and is a flashback in this one. Hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think! :)

* * *

Cristina sat down next to Meredith with a defeated force, banging her tray while doing so. Nobody flinched or bothered to look away from their food or conversation. To them, this was just Cristina being herself. She took a bite of her sandwich and swallowed it after barely chewing it. She grabbed her fork and stabbed her salad harder than usual.

Meredith looked at her, one eyebrow raised "Whats wrong with you?"

"Nothing."

"Something's wrong with you." Meredith said decidedly.

"I'm just on edge." Cristina replied, not bothering to look up at her.

"You're always on edge. You're Cristina."

Cristina grunted a reply and went back to eating her food. She did have something on her mind and she knew that she could not talk to Meredith about it. It was not her place to do so.

She had spoken to Callie about Hahn earlier, trying her best to figure out why she had left so suddenly. She was beyond surprised to realize that Callie and Hahn were girlfriends or lovers or whatever. Cristina knew they were close but she always thought they were close in an "I'm your person" kind of way. Like Meredith and herself.

Maybe it was one sided, Cristina thought. Or maybe they were just super close to each other, so close that feelings of platonic love got confusing? Cristina would be lying if there were not days, specifically terrible days, when all she only wanted Meredith around. She could look at Cristina and know that something was up. She knew what to say or more importantly, what _not_ to say to Cristina.

No, there was something in the way Callie had looked today when she had told her it. Looking back, Cristina could tell there was something there. They way Hahn just lit up around Callie instead of being her usual grumpy and overbearing self. They way they looked at each other, over a patient or during surgery or even when they were just exchanging charts or lab reports.

Cristina's heart suddenly ached for Callie. She didn't want to assume, but in her heart she knew that Hahn had not said goodbye to Callie.

Yes, Cristina knew that feeling all too well.

It was terrible, devastating and cruel. In her own case it had been freedom, perhaps too much of it in one go. But not in Callie's. When someone left you like that, swiftly and suddenly, you fill in the conversations you have with them in your head. You fill in what you think they would say. Its endless wondering, the kind that consumes and ruins you. Cristina was not in love with Burke anymore, no the days of love for him were long gone. Yet it hurt occasionally. Like a broken bone that's healed, but still throbs every time it rains.

The thing with Burke had taught her a lot. Cristina had been all for the definition-less relationships for as long as she could remember. She didn't need to be titled as a girlfriend or lover, she just needed to be respected and she needed humor. She didn't shy away from authority figures, in fact she desired them. After the whole thing with Burke went down and she had more time to reflect, she did not know whether it was what they could have taught her that made Marlowe and Burke so desirable or was it the person themselves. One thing was for sure – dating an attending, not happening again. In fact she had not even bothered to date since Burke. It was as if she had been given a second chance or a clean slate, all she wanted was to re-focus her energy on surgery. No one distracting her or demanding things from her. All she had wanted was surgery.

That is, until Owen walked back into her life again.

Ever since, their talk in the elevator he had been acting cordially, more so than before. He was making an effort, Cristina could tell. He would nod at her politely, occasionally say a "Hello" or "Good Morning". And she had been very civil herself. They never called each other by their first names. Somehow using last names and their titles made it feel like they were just colleagues who had never locked lips before. And everything seemed to be getting on smoothly.

Except that Cristina noticed the looks. She saw how he looked at her. He seemed to be one of those people who didn't talk much about himself, but you could tell what he felt if you looked at his face. Cristina on the other hand was a master at disguising her feelings. She knew how to keep her face neutral. It was a blessing and a curse.

But she could tell that he looked at her. Really looked. When she would talk to him or near his vicinity his eyes were transfixed on her face, as if trying to memorize her features. When he handed her a patients' chart, he was careful not to touch her, but he gaze would linger a second too long at her hands or wrists. When she shrugged her hair off of one shoulder, he would look at the newly exposed skin with such longing. Cristina was sure that he would have grabbed her just like he had the first time he had kissed her. But he kept his distance, physically. Until this morning.

She had been standing at the ambulance bay tying up her trauma gown when out of nowhere she felt a pair of hands take the strings from her fingers. She barely had to look sideways to see who it was. Touching was normal when you are a surgeon. Handing things to one another, fixing people in the OR was an intimate experience. Side by side, you were bound to touch each other. And for someone who did not ease up to the touch easily, Cristina didn't mind any of the touching that happened in the OR.

But this morning as he stood behind her, his fingers barely even grazing her skin as he tied the strings, Cristina felt a jolt of electricity go through her. Which bothered her. She had been touched. She had been touched plenty by her previous lovers, but she couldn't remember such a light touch ever turning her on. It was always the heat of the moment, the wild caresses and the promise of more to come than turned her on. The truth was that Cristina had never considered herself the kind of women who needed – or even _liked_ – soft caresses. Maybe it was just Owen. Then again, she never thought she would tell anyone about her Dad so it was definitely just him. Thankfully, Callie had shown up as soon as she and Owen had exchanged pleasantries.

Meredith caught up to Cristina as they made their way back from lunch and said "Derek said you were on the homeless guy's case with him."

"Yeah, I am." Cristina replied, shrugging on her lab coat.

'With Hunt too." Meredith gave her a look.

Cristina could see where this was going so she said "And Sloan, and Torres and Little Grey."

"Ok, seriously? People need to stop calling her Little Grey!" Meredith exclaimed.

"I don't know. I think I like it better than Lexipedia."

Meredith looked sideways at Cristina "So everything is good with you and Hunt?"

"_So we're good?" "Yes, we're good"_

"Everything is fine."

Meredith placed a hand on Cristina's arm, trying to get her to stop walking and said "Seriously?"

"Yes, seriously." Cristina replied, very aware of the fact that she sounded whinier than usual.

"Cristina, the last time we talked about him you said he hates you. And now everything seems fine."

"Because it is."

Meredith looked at her, her silence speaking volumes.

"I'm not getting involved with another attending." Cristina stated

"Ok."

"He's not even into me." Cristina said.

Meredith smiled "Have you seen the way he looks at you? He wants you!"

"Oh God, Mer!" Cristina hissed. "Why don't you get a microphone and just announce it to the whole hospital!"

"Well, he did kiss you and now he's here and maybe -"

"Yang!"

Cristina and Meredith turned to see Owen striding towards them.

"Timothy's agreed to surgery. Scrub in right away." He said to Cristina as he walked past them.

"Okay." She turned back to Meredith only to find a smirk on her face. "Oh, shut up!"

Cristina turned and walked around the corner thinking to herself "He's not into me" over and over as she headed to surgery.

* * *

The surgery went terribly and they lost the patient. Cristina had never seen Callie in such a mess. She had started to cry in the OR saying she had built Timothy legs. But this wasn't about the patient. This was about Callie's broken heart. Had it been anything else, Cristina probably would not have bothered but she had been where Callie was so she dragged her and Sloan out for a drink.

They drank in silence, until Callie finally started talking. But Cristina was busying glancing at Owen. He looked miserable and angry, downing one drink after another. He seemed more devastated than usual and Cristina knew that something about Timothy had called out to him. Something that made him even more invested than usual. She watched him get up, throw some bills on the table and shrug his jacket on. He walked steadily to the door. He must not have had that much to drink or maybe he could hold his liquor.

Cristina downed her drink and got up, putting jacket on, leaving Mark and Callie together. She knew that Mark would take care of Callie. She wanted to talk to Owen. She had to see if he was okay. It didn't mean anything. They were just colleagues, and colleagues should look out for one another.

She followed him, running to catch up with him. She touched his arm as she said "Hey." and he shoved her off forcefully. His breath was quickened and his eyes were wide and dark.

She backed up a bit and said "I'm sorry we lost him.. the patient. I'm sorry."

He was quiet for a second and then he said "I don't need you to be sorry."

"Okay." Cristina replied not knowing what to say to that.

And then he moved closer, his voice dropping to frantic whispers, telling her that he didn't need her. Her back hit the wall and he moved in even closer. Cristina knew she should have felt scared. He could have very well been drunk and could have harmed her. And before she could think of anything else, he closed the distance between them with a quick, aggressive sound and his lips captured hers.

The kiss was rough and possessive, as he grabbed on to her. He was everywhere all of a sudden. His tongue in her mouth, his beard feeling deliciously rough on her skin , one of his hands holding on to her jacket and the other one framing her face. It took her a second to hold on to him, her fingers on the nape of his neck, caressing the soft skin. It felt new and dangerous, yet familiar as his scent enveloped her senses. He smelt exactly how she had remembered. She let out a little moan and that seemed to fuel him further as his teeth scraped her bottom lip. He tasted of scotch as she probably did to him, no doubt. His hips ground against her and she was fully aware that she was trapped between this man and the wall. Something about being trapped made her feel lightheaded than she already did. She could feel the desire and longing spark through her body, collecting somewhere in her abdomen.

They both came apart and he almost leaned back him but she just stood there with her mouth slightly open, trying to take in what just happened. She looked up at him. Gone was the confident, commanding man and instead was someone who's eyes were clouded with desire and his body very much pressed to hers. But he didn't say anything. So she decided she wouldn't either. He had made the move, he had made the decision to kiss her.

But, nagged the annoying voice in her head, you opened your mouth and kissed him right back.

He backed away a bit and Cristina took it as her cue to leave. She walked away, surprised she could keep a steady pace because her body was humming with need. She refused to acknowledge it as she walked to her apartment and let herself in. She leaned against the door and closed her eyes.

Okay, she thought. So maybe he is into you.


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note**: Hello, hello, hello! Let me start with an apology. I meant to write and upload this chapter nearly a week ago, but I have been so busy. New job and busy weekends. But better late than never right? Secondly, the reviews! The reviews just took my breath away. They have given me more confidence and incentive to write. So thank you ever so much. This chapter is in Owen's POV as the previous one was in Cristina's. I think I will try to write both POV's in one chapter from now on though. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I would love to hear everyone's thoughts again. :)

* * *

"Hunt!'

Owen turned around and watched Derek Shepherd make his way towards him. Shepherd had a big smile planted on his face but that wasn't unusual. He was almost always in a cheery mood.

"Shepherd."

"How are you?" Derek asked, walking beside Owen. "Getting used to being back in the hospital?"

Owen hated it whenever someone asked him a question like that. It made him think of how drastically different his life had been just a couple months ago. He got enough reminders of his "before" life without people constantly asking him a question like that. But Shepherd seemed like a good guy and Owen had come to respect him after their initial but brief dispute. Owen could tell he meant well.

"Yes, its certainly a change of pace." He replied.

"But you are doing OK so far?" Shepherd pressed on.

"Yes." Owen replied shortly. He was on edge today. Well, he had been on edge yesterday and losing Timothy had been hard. But what happened afterword had him on edge even today.

Shepherd gave him a look of sympathy and nodded a goodbye. Good thing about him was that his personality put people at ease. But Derek was good at reading people and he learned soon enough that Major Owen Hunt was almost always polite so he must be dealing with something.

Probably a woman, Derek thought to himself as he walked away. It was always a woman who brought out that kind of trouble to a man's mind.

Owen shook his head as he made his way back to the ER. He didn't mean to be rude. But he had a sneaky feeling Shepherd understood him.

He had a hard time understanding himself these days.

He had kissed her. _Kissed_ her.

It had been heaven and hell, all rolled up in one kiss. He had spent many of his waking hours thinking about her, planning how he would go about this thing with Cristina. He knew he would need to plan it out. But the truth was that Owen had never really been good at planning things out. He worked on instinct. On his gut. That is what made him the trauma surgeon he was today. Even in Iraq, his instinctive skills were well known and had come in quite handy.

But he was not the kind of man who just grabbed women out of the blue to kiss them. He had only done that with... well, Cristina.

He had been raised to be a gentleman and then had gone on to be an army man. He was a man of rules and manners. But something about Cristina had made him throw all of that out the window and just go for it.

In a way, he dealt with Cristina the way he dealt with surgery.

But he wanted to give her more. Cristina deserved so much more. Owen could tell she wasn't the kind of women who needed candles and roses. But she deserved much more than frantic kisses in the alley. He needed a plan. An outline of how he would go about it.

First things first, he needed to apologize. He needed to break the ice.

The opportunity to apologize presented itself about twelve minutes later as Owen stood in the ambulance bay waiting for a trauma. It was raining again, except tonight it was really coming down. He waited quietly till he caught someone walk past from the corner of his eye. From the way this person was huddled underneath the umbrella and the brisk pace, Owen could tell who it was.

"Dr. Yang?"

"Dr. Hunt."

His insides felt like jelly. He had a whole speech prepared which went along the lines of "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to grab you like that in the alley. Forgive me." But as soon as he saw her face, he forgot what he had to say in an instant.

The most awkward conversation they had ever had passed and then she left, looking disappointed or angry. He couldn't tell. He wanted to turn around, grab her and tell her what he had initially planned. And he would have too, if the ambulance hadn't shown up.

He had to get a hold of her later.

But he had absolutely no chance of speaking with her all day. The ER was busy, Torres broke her nose so he had to put in extra to compensate for the lack of their best Ortho resident. And later that day he heard something about some interns operating on themselves.

That has to be just a rumor, Owen thought to himself. Surely, individuals smart enough to call themselves doctors and be part of one the best surgical programs wouldn't do something that stupid.

But by the end of the day, Owen knew that it was not a rumor. And Cristina's intern had been the perpetrator of this debacle. He couldn't understand how something like this would even come about. Why in the world would a bunch of interns operate on themselves? And why would one of them agree to being operated on? He knew that Cristina would be giving her interns an earful about this. He was extremely curious to see how she was taking things. From what he had heard from Bailey, there would been serious consequences for anyone who was even slightly involved with this situation.

A couple hours later, just shy of six in the morning, he found himself sitting on her doorstep. The morning air was cold but he was determined to wait for her. Shortly after he saw her walking briskly in his direction. She was huddled in her coat, hands in her pockets and she had not seen him yet. She must have been several feet away from him when she looked up and locked eyes with him. She didn't shocked or angry. She was unreadable as usual.

"I don't know why I came here." He broke the silence. He suddenly wished he had prepared a speech or something. It wouldn't have matter. He felt tongue tied around her, especially when she stood there looking like a pillar of silent strength. Unwavering in the bitter cold.

"Do you want to come in?"

"No. I don't think that would be appropriate." _I do not want to think about what would happen if we are alone in your house._

"Do you want to go someplace else?"

"No."

And then she surprised him by sitting down next to him. A whiff of her scent was enough to make him question his motives. She had a heady scent of equal parts citrus and flower. Not enough to overwhelm his senses, but enough to drive him crazy.

But he needed to make things right with her.

He turned his head towards her slowly and took her in. Her profile was beautiful. The morning light hit her well. Her hair framed her face perfectly. Her deft little hands rubbed together. She looked soft and touchable. A stark contrast to what she looked like minutes ago. She had no shield up. He found himself wondering if this was the Cristina that met her lovers first thing in the morning. Would he ever get the chance to see her like that?

"I think you're beautiful."

No speeches, no pretense. No preparation was needed for telling her that he thought she was beautiful.

She turned to him, her eyes just slightly rounder giving away the shock they held. Other than that, nothing changed on her face. She folded her hands and tucked them under her chin. It was so feminine, so demure, that Owen wanted to tell her again.

She looked looked away from him, and faced forward. She sighed, deep and long and for the first time since he had been sitting here, he realized that things were not okay with her. Her head had hung a little when she had walked towards him. She had sat down beside him looking smaller than before. Her face held a look of defeat.

Cristina did not accept defeat. This much he knew.

He decided to take a leap of faith and asked her "Do you want to talk about it?"

She scoffed and for a minute he thought that they were back where they had started. She shook her head slowly, as if patronizing someone.

"My interns were operating on themselves."

She was patronizing herself.

"They operated on Sadie."

"They are interns. They do stupid things. Really stupid things, in this case." Owen said, not believing a word he said but wanting to offer some comfort.

"You don't get it." She said, with another shake of her head.

"What?"

She turned to look at him. "_My_ interns were operating. _My_ interns started this. It was Lexie Grey's idea to do this. Lexie Grey is _my_ intern."

No, Owen thought. She couldn't possibly be blaming herself for this.

"They were not just your interns." He said. "And you most certainly are not to blame for their reckless behaviour."

"Really?" Cristina said, eyes blazing. "Because I feel like I am to blame. A little at least. I was supposed to teach them but I did not. I didn't teach them so they taught themselves and butchered a girl."

She looked at him, fire in her eyes, daring him to contradict her. When he said nothing, she looked away. They sat in silence for a little while until she yawned. He should probably leave her alone. Let her get some rest. But he didn't want to. He couldn't leave her alone. Not today.

"Do you want to get a cup of coffee?" He asked, looking sideways at her.

"I thought that was inappropriate" She replied.

He couldn't believe he even said that. Nothing about them was appropriate. They both needed to accept that this was not conventional or traditional.

"No, coming inside your house would be inappropriate. Coffee on the other hand..." He said, still looking at her, hoping she would meet his gaze. She didn't disappoint. "Coffee is not inappropriate."

"That's nice of you. To offer I mean." Cristina said. "But you don't have to. The other attendings don't really care all that much."

"I'm not here as an attending. I am here as... I'm here to.. umm." Owen said, desperately trying to find words. What am I here as? Friend? No, I don't want to be friends.

"Oh." Cristina said, her mouth forming an 'o' shape which temporarily distracted Owen. But she understood.

"That's not a good idea." She said, looking away. "Just like that kiss wasn't a good idea."

"Which one?" He asked. They had kissed more than once after all.

"The one outside Joe's."

"Right. That was not a good judgement call, I know." He said. "I am sorry if it wasn't-"

"No." She interrupted him. "It was a good kiss. It took me by surprise though. But this" She gestured between them. "This is not a good idea."

"Why?"

"Because you are an attending. You are my boss. We work together."

"Are there rules against this?" He asked, shrugging. "Because Shepherd and Grey are a couple. And he's an attending and they work together too."

"I am not Meredith. I do not make decisions like her." There was a bitterness in her voice. He had thought they were very close friends. "Besides Meredith and Shepherd should not be used as a barometer for an ideal relationship."

Owen felt lighter inside as soon as he heard the word relationship. It seemed like she had given this a thought.

_A relationship._

"I didn't say anything about a relationship." He said, smirking so she knew that he was joking.

"Well, you don't strike me as a no strings attached kind of man." She said, a slight smirk of her own appearing on her face.

He nodded. He had expected her to be resistant, but now that he was face to face with it, it felt much different.

He was not the kind of man who just gave up. At the same time, he was not the kind of man who pushed. No meant no, and Cristina seemed to be saying no.

"What happens now?" She asked.

"You should go in and get some rest." He said. "Its cold out here."

"Yeah."

They sat in silence just a little while longer, not wanting to leave each other. Cristina got up first and then so did he. He walked down the steps and turned around to watch her unlock her front door.

"Cristina."

She turned around. He wanted to tell her she was beautiful again.

"This isn't over." He said, his voice almost a whisper. Owen never gave up. Just like Cristina didn't accept defeat.

"I know." And with that she was gone.

He turned around and walked back to the hospital, the cold air enveloping him.

The cold air felt like home.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Hello, hello! Yes, I know. This chapter is a long time coming. Honestly, I just had a lack of inspiration for a while and couldn't write. But thankfully that didn't last too long. Hope you enjoy reading it and let me know what you think. Reviews are always welcome! :)**

Cristina closed the door of her apartment and leaned against it. Hadn't she done this exact same thing after he had kissed her that night in the alley?

Today he called her beautiful. What the hell was going on?

She needed to hop in the shower, take a nap, do some laundry, make coffee and study. But all she could do was stand against the door. The magnitude of everything hit her. The day, the interns, operating on Sadie, fighting with Meredith, Owen at her doorstep calling her beautiful. It was so much all of a sudden.

She walked gingerly to the couch and plopped down. She wanted to call Meredith and talk about this. The urge to call her friend was odd. Cristina was hardly the kind of woman who called her girlfriends to talk about men and analyze every detail of her encounter with them. She never even had girlfriends before. Perhaps the freshness of their fight was sinking over her and making her feel Meredith's absence. Perhaps she needed to talk it out. Or even dance it out.

Cristina glanced at the stereo, contemplating whether or not she should turn on the music and have a little dance party by herself. But she was tired and cold and hungry. Dancing would have to wait. As would Meredith.

With a heavy sigh she got up and walked towards her room. As soon as she turned the light on she was met with a huge pile of clothes on her bed. She needed to sort out her laundry but it would have to wait. She grabbed her pajamas and shoved everything else away. She opened up the blinds hoping that the light would prevent her from sleeping in too late. She plugged her phone into the charger, put her pager on the nightstand and sank in under her duvet. She got comfortable and closed her eyes, waiting for sleep to take over her tired and aching body.

_I think you're beautiful_

She squeezed her eyes shut really tight, hoping to rid her mind of blue eyes and breathtaking words.

Sleep came soon after.

* * *

Cristina woke several hours later and seriously contemplated not going into the hospital. The solo surgery was soon to be announced and her every waking moment for the past few days had been spent in preparation for it. However, the incident yesterday would have seriously compromised her chances of winning the surgery.

What would she do if she did in fact get taken out of the running? Who was to blame for that? Herself? Her idiot interns? Meredith?

Could she survive it?

She sighed heavily and threw off her cover, heading straight for the shower. She tried to wash away any memory of the previous day but it kept coming up. As did Owen and what he said.

No, Cristina thought to herself. You are not thinking about him in the shower.

Somehow the worry of losing the solo surgery was enough to make her not think about him right up until she saw him as she walked through the hospital doors. He was standing, mid conversation with Derek. They both stopped as they saw her approaching. She nodded at them as she walked past them. She was well aware that they had been discussing the incident that happened yesterday. Its as if she could feel his eyes burning into her back. And before she knew it he was walking beside her, matching her brisk pace.

"Hi." He said, his body feeling ridiculously close even though it wasn't.

"Hi."

"How are you?"

"Good." She replied, more gruffly than she wanted to sound.

"Not going to ask me how I am?" He said, smirking.

She slowed down a bit. He automatically matched his pace to hers. If anybody else looked at them, they seemed nothing more than two doctors out on a stroll. She looked at him to find him already looking at her.

I get it. She thought. Something about us. We... fit.

"How are you. Dr Hunt?"

Owen wished she wouldn't use his last name. He wished she would just say Owen, but he understood. This was her way of being familiar yet distant. And it was driving him insane.

"I am fine." He replied. "Did you get some sleep?"

"Yes."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "I meant, did you sleep well?"

"No." She said, laughing slightly. "I'm a surgeon. I don't think I've slept well since med school. Maybe even before that."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." He said. I know it very well, he thought.

Cristina saw Meredith approaching from the end of the hall. She hadn't seen Cristina yet. And Cristina wanted to prolong that inevitable encounter as long as she could. She saw Owen follow her gaze when she looked back at him. He nodded and opened him mouth to saw he would see her later when she suddenly grabbed his arm and steered him into an adjoining hallway.

"Cristina! What..-" He exclaimed.

"Lets go this way. It's the scenic route." She replied. Great save, you idiot, she thought to herself.

He gave her a bemused look and said "We are in a hospital. There is hardly anything scenic around here."

"Well, I like this way. It takes longer to get to the changing room." She said.

"Why take the longer route? You are always raring to go, get changed and get to a surgery as fast as you can." He said, chuckling. That's when he realized something was wrong. Cristina wasn't rushing to go to surgery. She was taking longer to get to the change rooms. She was avoiding something. He remembered a bit of their conversation at her doorstep. Her disgruntled reply about Meredith and he was certain he had caught a glimpse of Meredith when Cristina had steered him away.

She was avoiding Meredith.

Cristina watched his face as he no doubt worked out her excuses. She should have known she was a fool for trying to keep her guard up around him. It never seemed to work since the moment he showed up in her life.

"Something going on with you and Meredith?" He asked, getting straight to the point.

"No."

"Cristina." His voice was gentle, his eyes earnest.

"We had an argument. She should have stuck up for me and she didn't."

"And there is no way to resolve it?" He asked.

She looked at him quietly for a moment and said, "Well, no. Things usually resolve themselves, we don't do the whole thing."

"What thing?" He asked, confused.

"You know, the thing" She gestured with her hands, moving them between their bodies in a circle. "The whole I say sorry, she says sorry and then the hugging it out and talking about feelings. We don't do that."

Owen really wanted to point out that they were both adults and could easily resolve everything with one conversation but perhaps pointing out the flaws in their relationship was not the best way to get her.

"So do you have time to get some coffee?" He said, dropping the subject completley.

"No, Owen I.. I mean Dr. Hunt, I need to go, get changed." She said, starting to walk away from him. He lunged forward as he remembered something, and placed his hand on her arm.

"Wait."

She turned around and waited for him to speak.

"You are aware that they are voting for solo surgery today, right?" He asked her, looking down at her face.

"Yes."

"Okay."

She nodded and walked away from him.

The rest of the day went by too fast yet at the same time, too slow. It felt as if every breath Cristina took was causing her the kind of pain she wanted to forget. It felt like everything that gave her life was being taken away from her. In the back of her mind she was aware that she was at fault as well. Especially for not teaching her interns. She thought about what Bailey had done when she was in Cristina's position. Bailey had always been a good teacher. Cristina also knew that Meredith was trying to do the right thing, atleast the way she saw it. But Cristina expected Meredith to have her back, the way she would if the roles were reversed.

Would she? Or would she leave Meredith to fend for herself.

But right in that moment, as she handed her proverbial baton over to Karev, her heart was too ladled with grief to even acknowledge her fault.

She was vaguely aware of him, following her out of the gallery and leading her down a stairwell. Tears were running down her face, her hair was a mess but his scent was in the air and that was all she could care about. She knew exactly what was going to happen. Call it female intuition, but she knew. She had no idea where he was taking her and if she hadn't been so upset, she would have probably been a bit worried about following him to the basement. But as she felt his warmth close by, she felt safe.

And yet her heart was beating like a wild animal, locked in a cage.

He took her to the boiler room, told her why he came here and watched her laugh as the air rushed through her body. He looked at her with a smile and a twinkle in his eyes. Not dark and haunted, like his eyes usually did. As she looked up into his face, something fell into place. Like it did this morning, when she walked next to him. She forgot about the fact that he was an attending, she forgot about the solo surgery, about Meredith. She threw caution to the wind and leaned in towards him, knowing full well that he would lean into her.

And he didn't disappoint.

He kissed her with passion but the frantic need was missing this time. This was almost like their very first kiss. His arms engulfed her and moved her further in towards him. The air blew up at them, but they hardly noticed. They were out of time, out of space just like he said they would be.

He grabbed her harder around the waist, turned her around and walked her to the walk leaning her against it. His mouth never leaving hers. Cristina's hand moved further down, gripping on to his arm and resulted in a moan, whether it came from her or him, she would never know.. Somewhere she heard a pager go off. When the beeping continued, Cristina broke away from him and said "Is it you or me?"

"I don't really care right now." He replied, his voice deep and his mouth moving across her jawline then to her neck.

Cristina tilted her head back to give him access, her eyes rolling back into her head. "It could be a trauma."

"Mmmhmm it could be."

"Seriously... Dr. Hunt... You might be needed."

That seemed to get his attention. He brushed a wild curl away from Cristina's eyes. He kept a tight grip on her waist with one hand, and placed the other hand on the wall, slightly above her head. Looking into her eyes he said "I have you pinned against a wall. I think you can drop the "doctor" and just call me Owen."

Oh dear God, did he just say that, Cristina thought to herself.

And then she remembered the last time he had her pinned against the wall, several weeks ago. She remembered the thrill it had sent down her spine. And she remembered the way she felt later that night, when she was laying in bed. How she kept telling herself that this was not going to happen again. And yet, here she was. It's like she had no self control around him. She opened her mouth, ready to say something along the lines of 'This was a mistake.' when her beeper went off.

Owen chuckled, his voice sounding deeper than usual. "I guess we better head back."

Cristina nodded and followed him out of the boiler room. She watched him walk slightly ahead of her. His hair was ruffled, thanks to her. Something as trivial as that was tugging at her heart, in a way that scared her. He looked back at her and smiled before heading to the E.R. Cristina walked in the other direction, her mind already made up about him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello everyone! I wrote the next part over Christmas break but never posted it for whatever reason. So here it is. Hope you enjoy it and as usual reviews are always welcome! :)**

The snow was falling hard; the air was filled with the scent of cookies and pine, and there was something in the air that felt different. There was a feeling of joy accompanied by pangs of melancholy.

Christmas was here.

The holiday season meant that people would attempt to do things they hadn't done for a while, often resulting in injuries. And not to mention all the family togetherness that brought out the ulcers, panic attacks and severe alcoholism. All of this meant that the hospital staffs were overworked and much too busy to take out the time to enjoy the holidays.

Which was perfectly all right with Cristina and most of the other residents, except for Izzie. She had been wanting to turn Meredith's house into Santa's Village again. Not that Cristina had seen Meredith's house recently. She and Meredith had barely spoken to each other since their fight. Of course everyone else had hoped they would thaw out by now, but no. They were both as wintry with each other as the weather they encountered when they left their houses at the crack of dawn.

Everyone in the surgical unit seemed determined not to take sides. Everyone was friendly and cordial to both Cristina and Meredith. The rest of the residents expected everything to blow over soon as it always did. But they both had stood firm in themselves and had barely spoken to each other.

Until the other day when Meredith walked up to Cristina, with a determined look in her eyes.

Cristina was at the nurse's station looking through a patient's test in desperate hope of them being surgical.

Cristina looked up at Meredith as she stood in front of her and said, "So we are having a Christmas thing at the house."

Cristina was immediately taken aback. Christmas thing? The only person who hated the holidays more than Cristina was Meredith. This couldn't have been her idea. So maybe it was Derek's. Now had Cristina been in a better mood she would not have said what came flying out of her mouth next.

"You mean Derek is making you do a Christmas thing?" She said, hoping she would push the right buttons.

"Derek isn't making me do anything." Meredith replied, her eyes like daggers.

"So this was your idea?"

"No, of course not."

"So it was Derek's idea then." Cristina said, very aware of the fact that she was gloating.

"Look, I am trying here. It's Christmas. Everyone wants to do Christmas this year. There will be drinks and dinner and carols and all that. You spend time with your family on Christmas. Derek is family too now. And I just thought you would want to come. It's just that you…" Meredith stopped and sighed. "Christmas is a time for family or whatever so."

When Cristina didn't say anything, Meredith turned her heel and walked away. Before Cristina had any time to process Meredith's speech, her pager beeped. Incoming trauma.

She took a deep breath and snapped back into action.

* * *

Five hours later, she found herself next to Shepherd scrubbing themselves after a successful surgery.

"That was good." Shepherd said, his voice sounding annoyingly cheerful.

"Mmhmm." She hummed in agreement, afraid that if she talked Shepherd was going to talk to her more.

"I meant you." He said, giving her one of his charming smiles.

"What?"

"I meant you did well. Good job in there."

"Thanks." She said still not looking at him.

"You joining us tomorrow?"

"I don't know yet."

"Cristina?"

She sighed and turned herself to him "Derek?"

He smiled wider now, and said "I hope you come tomorrow night. There will be good food. And Izzie is making dessert."

'Look, I'm not big on the holidays. I don't celebrate them." Cristina said.

"Hmmm." He nodded. "Come anyway. Everyone will be there. It'll be strange if you didn't come."

She sighed knowing that there was no way out of this.

"She doesn't like the holidays either, Derek." Cristina said.

"I know. But she's learning to. And to be honest she needs you there. Even if she doesn't say it or realize it."

"Ok." Cristina replied.

"Drinks at 6:30." Derek said, as he left the scrub room. Cristina watched him leave as she had his girlfriend a few hours ago.

"So Shepherd gets to take you out before I do?"

Cristina smiled a secret smile as she heard that voice, sounding huskier than usual. She could feel his presence behind her and she turned around to look at him.

"You finished in there?" She asked, nodding her head towards the OR.

"You didn't answer my question." Owen replied, as he washed his hands.

"You didn't answer mine."

"Yes, we are finished in there." He chuckled, reaching for a towel to wipe him. "Now, you answer mine."

He was suddenly a lot closer to her, barely an inch between them.

"I don't remember your question."

"How come" Owen's voice seemed to have dropped an octave. "Shepherd gets to buy you drinks before I can?"

"He's not buying me anything." Cristina replied, looking up at him. He reached for her wrist, just a slight touch. Barely anything.

Enough to drive her mad.

"The point still stands." He said. "We kissed on three different occasions and yet you won't even let me buy you coffee. And don't tell me it was just that one time. "

He was right. He had asked her, nearly every morning since that time in the vent. And Cristina had, without fail, turned him down every time. She had been graceful about it. She had come up with relatively legitimate excuses too. It's not her fault that she worked in a hospital where she was needed to answer her pages at lightning speed.

But all of this reasoning hadn't stopped her from feeling guilty. She wanted so very badly to say yes to Owen. But at the same time, the urge to run in a different direction every time he came around was also very strong. She felt like she had led him on and as much as she was attracted to him, she would not compromise her position again. The old Cristina would have said 'Fuck it' to all her feelings and might even have jumped into bed with him. But the present Cristina was older, wiser and had the benefit of hindsight. The meaningless sex with an attending was not happening. In fact, the meaningless sex with anyone was not happening. She didn't want a relationship either. Or more like didn't have the time or energy for one. So that left her in a safe, secure and lonely place.

She hadn't been lonely for the longest time. She was relishing her independence and enjoying the lack of male company until the first night she met Owen. Every night since then on had been lonely. She barely felt it at first. But then it got bigger, deeper and just painful. But there was surgery and there was Meredith to keep her occupied. But lately she didn't have either. She didn't have Meredith and the surgeries she had scrubbed in on were not of much interest to her. Like right now, scrubbing in with Shepherd on neuro. She hadn't really felt like herself since the solo surgery was taken away from her.

The thought of which brought her back to that night, and to the man standing in front of her.

"Look, I've been busy. There is no convoluted agenda here."

"Are you free right now?" Owen asked.

"Free?" Cristina asked, sounding confused. "I guess, for a little while I am."

"What do you do when you are free?"

"Sleep. Eat. Study for surgeries."

"And drink coffee?" Owen asked, a smile reappearing on his face.

Wow, Cristina thought. Did he just outwit me?

"Dr. Hunt," Cristina said, watching something change in his eyes as she used his formal name. "Wouldn't that be inappropriate?"

He laughed as he remembered their conversation. "I was an idiot back then."

She chuckled and walked away, happy to have gotten out of that situation once again without having to explain anything.

* * *

Meredith's house looked beautiful, festive and all together unrecognizable. Everyone was there. The Chief, a few attendings, residents (the one's they liked, that is), some idiot interns. There was food, ample wine, and a 7-foot Christmas tree twinkling with lights and ornaments. This wasn't the Santa's village Izzie had set up a few years ago. Oh no, this was very much Meredith and Derek. Most people couldn't tell the difference, but as soon as Cristina stepped through the front doors, she knew. The bar cart was Derek's; the way he had set up the drinks seemed different and fashionable. There were touches of Meredith everywhere too. She used her mother's china and the decorations were tasteful and timeless.

But what struck Cristina the most was the fact that Meredith's house now looked like a home. And all of a sudden, she could see something she hadn't seen before. And that was family. Derek was Meredith's family.

"Um Cristina, do you maybe want to move inside?" Owen asked, standing behind her as she had paused in the doorway to take everything in.

"Sure," She said, moving aside and taking off her coat. Meredith walked in at the same time.

"You came." She said, surprise evident in her voice. Her eyes traveled past Cristina to Owen. "And you brought Dr. Hunt?"

"Yes, well. " Cristina cleared her throat. "I need a drink."

She hadn't meant to flee the scene but the interrogatory look on Meredith's face was something she wanted to avoid. She did not want to answer questions simply because she did not have answers. She did not even know how she ended up in the ER hoping to see Owen, earlier this afternoon. He was in one of the trauma rooms all by himself.

"Hi." She said. He turned around and looked at her with something of a surprised look.

"I wanted to ask you something." She continued, knowing very well that if she stopped at any moment, she would back down. "Meredith's having this Christmas thing and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me."

"Oh." Owen said, a bit confused as to why she was asking him come to her best friends dinner party with her. "Well, Shepherd invited me too."

"Great! So you were planning on going anyway, so now we can go together."

Of course, now would have been a great time to tell her that he wasn't planning on going to the dinner party. But Owen was tempted with the idea of spending some time with her. However, he wasn't going to let her get what she wanted so easily. He had teased her yesterday and now he wanted to dig a little deeper.

"Why aren't you just going by yourself? I mean, you know everyone who is going to be there."

"I won't go otherwise." She said simply. "This way I at least have a reason and I won't back out."

"Ok." He replied, smiling. "I'll pick you up."

"Ok." She replied, turning away. When she got to the door she turned around and said "This is not a date, by the way."

"Oh, it's not?" Owen asked. "It sure feels like it could be." She was just so easy to wind up.

"No!" Cristina exclaimed. "It's not a date. Definitely not a date. Pick me up around 6:30 please."

This was how she ended up at Meredith's house with Owen in tow. She poured herself some white wine and turned around to survey the crowd. Meredith appeared next to her with a bucket of ice in her hands.

"You brought a date?" Meredith asked her, placing the bucket on the bar cart and arranging some bottles around it.

"No." Cristina replied. Meredith raised an eyebrow to which Cristina replied. "Derek invited him. He just gave me a ride. I didn't want to drive my motorcycle or hire a cab."

"Why didn't you ask Callie?"

"So you celebrate Christmas now?" Cristina asked, changing the subject. Meredith sighed and walked away.

Dinner was delicious, and probably the first proper meal Cristina had eaten in a few days. She basically lived off of cafeteria food or cold cuts so the holiday feast was very much welcome. She had gobbled everything on her plate and even had seconds. Karev had made some comment about stuffing her face too much but she didn't care. She especially didn't care that Owen was sitting next to her and watching her closely, because she was not trying to impress him.

Not one bit.

Dessert was served and then everyone waddled back to the living room with drinks in hand. There was a great deal of laughter and of course talking about surgeries. But what else could be expected when a bunch of surgeons gathered together around a fire? Cristina was more than fine with that. Of course she cared more about cardio surgeries that say peds or neuro. But it was nice to be surrounded by people who were just as driven as her. This was much different than the holidays at her mother's house.

She was certain she preferred this.

She wandered back towards the kitchen, hoping to see Meredith. Cristina was in a forgiving mood, no doubt due to all the food and wine she had consumed. But as she walked into the kitchen it was not Meredith she saw, but Derek.

"Cristina, I'm glad you came." He said, giving her a classic McDreamy smile. "I'm surprised Hunt came. I guess you got to him, huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he told me he wouldn't be coming." Derek replied. "But I'm glad he did. Are you guys….?" He asked, a teasing smile appearing on his face.

"No. We're just… you know. We're nothing really." Cristina concluded. "Do you know where he is?"

"Ah, yes." Derek said, taking a swig of his drink. "The hospital paged him, so he just stepped out to check."

"Ok." Cristina turned around to make her way to the front porch when Derek stopped her. She turned around to look at him. He closed the small distance between them and gave her a hug. An _unwanted_ hug to be precise.

"Thanks for coming, Cristina." He whispered. "Merry Christmas."

Cristina gave a slight nod and broke free from him and left without turning back. She saw Owen on the front porch, drink in hand.

"Hey." She said, making her way towards him. She should have grabbed her coat. Seattle was always so cold.

"Cold?" Owen asked her as she rubbed her arms to generate some heat.

"Yeah. You think I'd be used to the weather in this place by now but no." She said, standing next to him. The night was dark and cloudy. It was definitely going to snow.

"You're not from Seattle?" He asked. There was so much he didn't know about her yet. I've barely scratched the surface, he thought.

"No, Beverly Hills." She replied, and smirked when she saw the look on his face. She always enjoyed telling people that.

"I can go grab your coat if you want. You're not wearing all that much." Owen said, gesturing to her tight short sleeved sweater. She looked different than she did in her usual scrubs. She looked feminine and sexy.

Cristina saw the way his eyes traveled over her body. She felt warm suddenly and a bit tingly. Maybe that was too much wine for one night, she thought.

"How come you're not inside?" She asked, hoping to break the sexual tension between them.

"Its just…" Owen sighed. "Being around this many people sometimes is a bit much for me."

Cristina nodded not knowing what to say. There was so much about his life she didn't know. She was just about to ask him about the page he got when he said, "Thanks for asking me to come with you."

"Yeah."

"Why did you ask me?" He turned towards her, looking right at her. He looked very much like the honest and honorable man that he was.

"I didn't want to come alone. And you were the only person I really wanted to come with." She replied, looking past him. She allowed herself this one moment of honesty. Just once.

"Cristina?"

She looked up at him. He was closer than before.

"You have been avoiding me." Owen said. "And don't say that you haven't been, because you have."

Cristina sighed and looked away from him. It had started snowing. She looked back at him and simply said, "Yes, I have been avoiding you."

They both looked at each other not missing a beat, until Owen said, "I'm going to kiss you now."

"Why?" Cristina asked, her breath catching already. He moved closer to her.

"Because its Christmas."

"Then you should know that I'm Jewish." Cristina replied, with a hint of a smile.

Owen chuckled and said. "Well, I'm going to kiss you anyway."

And he did.


End file.
